I SPENT much of February sick, including nearly two weeks in bed, so I got a lot of reading done.
* NOW WITH STAR RATINGS (ala Wrestling Observer Newsletter PPV
reports) *
HOW I RATE THE COMICS VIA THE ALAN
MOORE SCALE
***** Watchmen, Miracleman,
V For Vendetta
**** From Hell, Supreme,
Swamp Thing, Fashion Beast, League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen (first two
series)
*** Axel Pressbutton,
Tom Strong
** Promethea
* LoEG: Century:
1969
DUD (or lower) any of his non-comics stuff
1. Lorelei
Presents: House Macabre #1 (StarWarp Concepts, 2015) **¼
Writers:
Steven A. Roman & Dwight Jon Zimmerman /Artists: Uriel Caton & Chuck
Majewski, Lou Manna, John Pierard, Juan Carlos Abraldes Rendo (interior); Louis
Small Jr (cover)
Sexy
succubus plays hostess to several uninspiring House Of Mystery-style tales with
“twist” endings. Not awful. You can buy the comic in digital or hard-copy
formats from www.starwarpconcepts.com.
2. The
Collector #21 (Bill G. Wilson, 1970) -**
3.-6. Rocket’s Blast Comicollector #141, 142,
148, 150 (James Van Hise, 1978-79) **
Writers/artists:
various
I
bought a bunch of comics fanzines from the 1970s/early 80s for a buck each at
Elizabeth’s in January. I’ve slowly worked my way through all of them and I
will write my bloggy thoughts on them down the road.
But I
do want to list a few here, because some zines ACTUALLY featured comic strips
and I think that makes them count as comics.
The Collector’s editor and
publisher Bill G. Wilson wrote and drew Hyperman, a sub-standard,
three-pager featuring his hero posing against black backdrops, confronting a
generic bald villain and knocking him out. I don’t know how, but Wilson managed
to “write” and “draw” an eight-panel strip where every single panel bears no
logical relationship to the panel that precedes it. What’s even more
incredible, he somehow managed to get industry veteran Don Newton to ink this
abortion. Maybe ‘cos Newton started out as a contributor to RBCC in the 60s, he
felt a sense of obligation to a new generation, perhaps.
RBCC (which is much easier on the tongue than its
clunky full name) had a couple of semi-regular strips. Pertwillaby Papers by Don
Rosa (#141, 142, 148, 150) was a pseudo-intellectual sci-fi fantasy mash-up
that was horrible on most levels. Pertwillaby is a cocky, naive young scientist
who gets caught up in crazy adventures (travelling to the centre of the earth
or travelling back in time to King Arthur’s Court) with a motley crew of
friends and ne’er-do-wells. While Rosa’s cartoony art is fine, it’s his writing
that lets him down. He gives Pertwillaby huge chunks of fake science bullshit
to spout that fills up large portions of every panel. Most of the supporting
characters talk in accents, making it a challenge to decipher their speech
balloons The worst culprit is the Nazi scientist Prof. Viktor Smyte. Rosa also
uses Smyte’s character to make several offensive gas oven jokes that really
should have been excised by the editor before publication. Anyway, I can only
assume editor Van Hise indulged Rosa because he contributed so many other more
entertaining items to the fanzine. But still...Pertwillaby Papers was the shits.
The
other semi-regular strip was Twilight Of The Heroes (#141-142),
written and drawn by Ron Wilber. Ostensibly it’s a pre-Punisher Kills The Marvel Universe story where a bunch of DC and
Marvel heroes are murdered one by one by a mysterious villain. Wilber uses the
strip to fulfil his two fantasies in life: to see the two big companies’
characters fight alongside each other (Sub-Mariner with Aquaman, Batman with
Captain America, etc) and to draw Wonder Woman topless. He “succeeds” on both
counts. *clapclapclap*
#141
also includes a remarkable eight-page tale titled The Secret Files Of Dr Drew,
reprinted from Rangers Comics
(c.1949-50). It was written and drawn by Jerry Grandenetti, but at first glance
it looks like it was the work of Will Eisner. Not surprising, really, as Jerry
ghosted on The Spirit in the late
40s. Beautiful, pre-Code spookiness.
#142
celebrates Spielberg’s new movie with a short strip titled Close Encounters Of
The Nerd Kind (Writers: Jim Jones & Ronald Wilber/Artist: Ronald Wilber),
which looks at an alien masquerading as a human who plays an alien on a TV
show. Cute idea.
#148
has the fascinating first instalment of The Mutant Handbook, an illustrated
essay about the X-Men, written by Kurt Busiek and drawn by Scott McLeod.
#150
has a special Fred Hembeck strip titled The Fred Hembeck No One Cares About,
detailing his painful attempt to be a non-humorous superhero artist, which
ended in one brutal meeting with hack DC inker Vince Colletta. Looking at his
original “serious” art, I’m glad Mr Hembeck stuck with the funny stuff.
That
same issue has Inside The RBCC!, a bit of whimsy by Wilber to celebrate the
milestone issue.
There’s
also The RBCC Artists’ Jam, starring Hembeck, Rosa and a few future superstars
like Marc Hempel, Hilary Barta, RC Harvey, Kerry Gammill, Dennis Fujitake, Bret
Blevins and Steve Bissette.
Bissette
also contributes a one-page artists’ profile that’s the most professional
artwork in all the RBCCs I read.
There’s
a bonus Pertwillaby Papers
centrespread which isn’t half-bad, because it features Giger’s Alien murdering
most of the cast.
Finally,
Jim Kuzee contributes Future History Comic Chronicles, a
bit of sci-fi fluff that was pretty far off the mark about what would become of
Marvel and DC in the future of “2000”.
7. The
Black Vortex: Alpha (Marvel, 2015) ***½
Writer:
Sam Humphries/Artists: Ed McGuinness with Kris Anka, Mark Farmer, Jay Leisten
& Mark Morales
The new
X-Men/Guardians Of The Galaxy crossover at least has a sense of humour to it,
which makes it far more readable than the usual X-Men tosh. I don’t like the
new demonic look of The Beast, though.
8. The
United States Of Murder Inc. #6 (Icon, 2015) ****
Writer:
Brian Michael Bendis/Artist: Michael Avon Oeming
9.-14. C.O.W.L.
#2-7 (Image, 2014) ****
Writer:
Kyle Higgins & Alec Siegel/Artists: Rod Reis (interiors #2-7), Stéphane
Perger (#4), Elsa Charretier (#6); Trevor McCarthy (cover)
15.-35. Marvel
Masterworks: The Fantastic Four Vol. 1 (Marvel, 2009) & Marvel Essential: The Fantastic Four Vol.
1 (Marvel, 2008) *****
-
originally published in The Fantastic
Four #1-20 & Annual #1
(Marvel, 1961-63)
Writer:
Stan Lee/Artists: Jack Kirby & friends
This is
kinda weird. Without a doubt, this is a classic superhero comic told by the
industry’s two biggest legends. But there’s no doubt that re-reading them 54
years later does reveal some...shortcomings to the title. Lee focuses so much
on dumb intra-quartet bickering that it wears thin pretty quick. Invisible Girl
is depicted as truly feeble and worthless. The team’s origin is just so fucking
dumb. Did NO-ONE notice that a scientist, his girlfriend and her 16yo brother
were stealing a space ship to ‘beat the Commies” to outer space. Isn’t that a
criminal offence?
Surprisingly,
Kirby’s art comes across as quite primitive (compared to what he went on to
produce in the mid-to-late 60s), not helped by some shoddy inking by the likes
of Dick Ayers and Sol Brodsky (the one exception comes in FF #13 when the
inking is handled by Steve Ditko, who does a “Wally Wood” and stamps his own
inimitable style to Kirby’s pencils).
And
while I should appreciate the relative diversity of super-villains on display
in these first 21 issues (as opposed to, say, Fawcett’s Captain Marvel, which
featured Dr Sivana practically every issue), there’s still waaaaaay too much
Sub-Mariner and Doctor Doom in these early issues.
That
said, I KNOW that these were revolutionary stories back in 1961, so I need to
look at them from that perspective rather than my jaded 2015 perspective.
And
y’know, if I do that, these stories fucking rock.
36. The
Woods #10 (BOOM!, 2015) ***
Writer:
James Tynion IV/Artist: Michael Dialynas
37.-38. The
New 52: Future’s End #40-41 (DC, 2015) ***¾
Writers/artists:
various
40.-45. Outcast
Vol. 1: A Darkness Surrounds Him (Image, 2015) ****
-
originally published in Outcast #1-6
(Image, 2014-15)
Writer;
Robert Kirkman/Artist: Paul Azaceta
46. The
Mystery Play (Vertigo, 1994) ***¼
Writer:
Grant Morrison/Artist: Jon J. Muth
One of
Grant’s more pretentious, obscure comics. An escaped lunatic masquerades as a
cop while attempting to solve the murder of “God”, the star of a small-town
passion play. Yep, pretty pretentious.
47. Neil
Gaiman’s Only The End Of The World Again
(Oni Press, 2000) ***½
-
originally published in Oni Double
Feature #6-8 (Oni Press, 1998)
Writers:
Neil Gaiman & P. Craig Russell/Artist: Troy Nixey
48.-51. Fury:
My War Gone By #10-13 (Marvel, 2013) ****
Writer:
Garth Ennis/Artist: Goran Parlov
52. Barbarians And Beauties #1 (AC Comics,
1990) *
Writers:
unknown/Artists: Joe Orlando & Wally Wood, John Giunta, Sid Greene, Larsen
Old
Avon reprints from the early 1950s. Unremarkable, dull stuff, even the Captain
Science strip featuring some primiive Orlando art inked by Wood.
53. The
Age Of Heroes #3 (Image, 1997) **¾
Writer:
James D. Hudnall/Artist: John Ridgway
Innocuous
B&W sci-fantasy that wouldn’t have looked out of place in Warrior magazine 15 years earlier.
54. Vertigo
Double Shot: Young Liars/House Of Mystery (Vertigo, 2008) ****
-
originally published in Young Liars
#1 & House Of Mystery #1
(Vertigo, 2008)
Young Liars: Writer/artist: David Lapham
House Of Mystery: Writer: Matthew
Sturges, Bill Willingham/Artists: Luca Rossi, Ross Campbell (interior) Sam
Weber (cover)
House Of Mystery is genuinely
disturbing. I’ll try to buy the first volume one day. I already have Young Liars Vol. 1 – the first issue was
excellent.
55.-58. The
Squidder #1-4 (IDW, 2014) **¾
Writer/artist:
Ben Templesmith
I love
Ben’s artwork but he proves once again that he can’t write very well.
59.-63. God
Hates Astronauts #1-5 (Image, 2014-15) ***¾
Writer:
Ryan Browne/Artists: Jordan Boyd (interior); Ryan Browne (main covers)
64.-67. Imperial
#1-4 (Image, 2014) ***¼
Writer:
Steven T. Seagle/Artist: Mark Dos Santos
If you
had to choose to be the world’s only superhero and have the best girlfriend in
the world, what would you choose? Surprisingly, the working-class schlubs in
this miniseries gives up God-like powers for some chick. Go figure.
68. The
Mighty Thor #199 (Marvel, 1972) ***½
Writer:
Gerry Conway/Artists: John Buscema & Vince Colletta
The
very first comic I ever owned. Distribution in Australian newsagencies was so
spotty in the 70s, however, that I never saw Thor #200.
69.-76. Caper
#5-12 (DC, 2004) ***
Writer:
Judd Winick/Artists: John Severin (#5-8); Tom Fowler (#9-12)
Fun
crime reads and Severin’s art is a joy to behold, but these final eight issues
aren’t a patch on the opening arc.
77.-80. Justice
Society of America #1-4 (DC, 2007) ***½
Writer:
Geoff Johns/Artists: Dale Eaglesham (pencils) & Art Thibert (inks #1) &
Ruy Jose (inks #2-4); Alex Ross (cover)
I gave
up on the previous JSA series, but I
finally picked up the start of the second modern-day run of my fave super-group
for...um, some reason. It was alright, but I doubt I’ll pick up the rest of the
run, especially as it’s all been retrospectively erased by the New 52.
81. Justice
League United #10 (DC, 2015) ***
Writer:
Jeff Lemire/Artists: Neil Edwards, Jay Leisten & Keith Champagne
82. Justice
League 3000 #14 (DC, 2015) ***½
Writers:
Keith Giffen & JM DeMatteis/Artists: Andy Kuhn (interior); Howard Porter
(cover)
83. Guardians
Of The Galaxy #24 (Marvel, 2015) ***¼
Writer:
Brian Michael Bendis/Artist: Valerio Schiti
The
Black Vortex crossover continues. Not sure what to make of it so far.
84. Image
Firsts: Wytches #1 (Image, 2014-15) ***¾
Writer:
Scott Snyder/Artist: Jock
This is
pretty damn horrifying. I’m gonna have to buy the first trade when it comes
out.
85. Wild’s
End #6 (BOOM!, 2015) ***½
Writer:
Dan Abnett/Artist: LNJ Culbard
An
interesting take on the War Of The Worlds
mythology comes to a somewhat abrupt end, as if Abnett got word that sales were
poor and decided to wrap up the storyline before the series was axed. This
issue felt very rushed.
86. Guardians
3000 #5 (Marvel, 2015) ***¾
Writer:
Dan Abnett/Artist: Gerardo Sandoval (interior), Alex Ross (cover)
87. Southern
Bastards #7 (Image, 2015) ****
Writer:
Jason Aaron/Artist: Jason Latour
88-89. She-Hulk
#11-12 (Marvel, 2015) ***½
Writer:
Charles Soule/Artists: Javier Pulido (interior); Kevin Wada (cover)
So this
series wasn’t axed after all. It was always meant to be a 12-issue maxiseries.
That’s a relief – still, shame it’s gone. Series ended a bit flat, but it’s
nice to know that She-Hulk and friends will still have a supporting role in the
new Howard The Duck series.
90. Savage
Sword of Criminal (Image, 2015) *****
Writer:
Ed Brubaker/Artist: Sean Phillips
This
loving homage to Marvel’s B&W magazine line in the 1970s is glorious.
Phillips slips in and out of his usual Criminal art style (which is the main
story set in the 70s) to the more psychedelic, Spanish/Filipino-styled
barbarian artwork we saw in Conan and
even the Warren B&W titles. Phillips even apes a Joe Jusko-style cover.
This is a fucking masterpiece.
91. The
Castaways (Absence Of Ink Comic Press, 2002) ****¾
Writer:
Rob Vollmar/Artist: Pablo G. Callejo
I read
about this graphic novel in an ad in Farel Dalrymple’s Pop Gun War comic.
Looked intriguing and I found a cheap copy at Lone Star (mycomicshop.com). Set
in America during the Depression, it’s about a boy who leaves home on a quest
to make money to send home to his struggling family. Along the way, he
befriends an old black hobo and learns the brutal reality of riding the rails
in the 1930s. It’s a short, harsh-but-beautiful tale. A forgotten gem that
deserves to be rediscovered by a larger audience.
92. Marvel
Superheroes #7 (Marvel, 1991) ½* (for Steve Ditko’s art)
Writers/artists:
various
This
100-page anthology sums up all that was horrible and shitty about Marvel (and
DC) in the early 90s. Grim, bitter superheroes...psychotic
supervillains...brutal deaths of innocents...inept writing and shitty art by no-name
talent, most of whom I’ve never heard of (Barry Dutter? Larry Alexander? Gary
Hartle?)...blurgh. Naturally, to sell the thing to gullible punters, the lead
story stars the X-Men. Then there’s crappy back-up tales featuring C-grade
superheroes like Cloak & Dagger, The Shroud (partially redeemed due to Ditko’s
pencils, the only decent thing in the whole comic) and Marvel Boy. The latter
tale was the only reason why I bought the bloody thing because it features a
pro wrestling storyline. I’m such a mark for pro wrestling...
93.-96. Power
& Glory #1-3, Power & Glory
Holiday Special (Malibu, 1994) **
Writer/artist:
Howard Chaykin
Howie
tries to do an “adult” superhero yarn, which boils down to soft-core sex
scenes, a tranny bad guy and pedo jokes. Also, Chaykin just isn’t a very good
writer, even though the idea of a government-made, fake superhero for marketing
pruposes is interesting. His art is nice, but overall Chaykin’s yarn is a FAIL.
97.-99. Hercules
Unbound #1, 7-8 (DC, 1975-77) **
Writers/artists:
various
All for
the Wally Woods inks, man. All for the inks.
100. Evaristo:
Deep City (Catalan, 1986) **¾
Writer:
Francisco Solano Lopez/Artist: Carlos Sampayo
Cops’n’crime
short story collection set in Argentina. Lots of brutality, official corruption
and unexpected pathos. I feel these Argentine stories have lost something in
the translation, but Sampayo’s B&W art is gorgeous. And hell, I only paid
$1 for it.
101. Sex
#8 (Image, 2013) DUD
Writer:
Joe Casey/Artist: Piotr Kowalski
Well,
after finally reading the final issue of the first arc, I can safely say that
this is THE MOST OVERRATED COMIC BEING PUBLISHED TODAY. And Joe Casey is a
self-absorbed shithead with an overblown opinion of himself, his writing
ability and his “place” in the comic industry. This final issue was boring and
anticlimactic, probably a bit like having sex with Casey. Luckily, it was over
quickly...which is probably a bit like having sex with Casey as well. Utter
shit.
102. Drawn
And Quarterly #9 (Drawn And Quarterly, 1992) ***½
Writers/artists:
various
A mixed
bag of an anthology, starring the likes of David Mazzucchelli, Peter Kuper and
Seth. The highlight is Michael Dougan’s “Kentucky Fried Funeral”, a grim, blackly
comic tale of the author’s time working in a funeral home while suffering a
relationship (and mental) breakdown. I mean, I assume it’s autobiographical.
103. Merchants
Of Death #1 (Eclipse, 1988) *½
Writers/artists:
various
Middling
war and action tales from Euro-creators, plus an out-of-place spy yarn written
by a young Kurt Busiek.
104. Breckinridge
Elkins: Mountain Man (breckinridgeelkins.com, 2010-14) ****
Writers:
Robert E. Howard (original story) & Gary Chaloner (adaptation)/Artist: Gary
Chaloner
This is
a 30-page online story adapted from the original book by the creator of Conan
the Barbarian. It’s a classic tall tale about a backwoods bumpkin in rural
America, a case of mistaken identity, a bare-knuckle fist fight and a bunch of
gun-toting, trigger-happy cowboys. It’s funny and silly, but Chaloner’s art is
a joy to behold. I’m glad he finally got around to finishing it. It was reprinted
in Savage Sword #7-9 (Dark Horse,
2014).
105. Heavy
Metal Vol. XVII No. IV (Metal Mammoth Inc., 1992) ***
Writers/artists:
various
Richard
Corben, Garry Leach, Bill Sienkiewicz, Rick Geary and a complete edition of
Serpieri’s Druuna: Creatura. And yet, the mag is still kinda...meh.
106. Weirdo
#10 (Last Gasp, 1984) ***½
Writers/artists:
various
Crumb!
Bagge! Beaut underground-style goodness!





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